IVF: the beginning

Another doctor appointment today (I’m going to laugh at that line after the next few months), this time discussing how we get going with, as they call it, “assisted reproduction”. Mr Nester and I had a long chat last weekend, and we came to the conclusion that there’s not a lot of point waiting. Since he is currently receiving chemotherapy, a return to normal fertility levels/sea of swimmers could take anywhere from 3 months to 2 years. Or not at all. And since he will be having more chemo early next year, that will mean we won’t be able to try again until this time next year, at the earliest. That’s assuming the swimmers return, which they may not. So, we’ve decided that instead of adding more uncertainty and more waiting to our already limbo-like lives, we’ll give a big fuck you to nature, and have a chat with science instead.

We spoke to our GP tonight, and he recommended one of the IVF clinics in Melbourne. I looked them up, along with other options, and we’re going to meet with a couple (one recommended, one cheaper!), to see what they suggest. From the website estimates, we’re going to be out of pocket by at least $2700, most likely quite a bit more. What they don’t say (well not loudly) with the prices are that they assume you have reached the Medicare Safety Net threshold (for those from o/s, this is basically an amount of accumulated medical costs where the government will give you more of a helping hand if you go over it). They also assume you have private health insurance (which we do), that covers fertility services (which ours doesn’t). We could be out by another grand or so. We’ll see.

Thankfully, we have a little bit of money set aside, which was to be saved so I could take extra time off work if we managed to fall pregnant. Fingers crossed the treatment works first time, in which case we may be able to make the shortfall back up in the resulting 9 months. Otherwise, we’ll be a little broke. You know what, though? Broke is fine. I’ve been broke, and I’ve been (relatively) well off. Money has never made me happy. Sure it makes the stress less when the bills roll in, but there’s no way I’m letting a bit of cash come between us and the chance of having a family. Not yet, anyway.

So I’ve contacted the two IVF clinics, now we wait to hear back so we can set up the initial appointment. Here’s hoping this is the start of what this blog was meant to be: a log of our journey to parenthood.

Jane xx

Other, parallel worlds

I just caught this post through the WordPress Reader, and it hit home for me in a way that not a lot has, when I comes to dealing with cancer as a partner, rather than the afflicted. It rings very true for my situation at the moment, and rather than try to replicate it, I thought it better that you should hear it from the source. Please read. It’s quite lovely.

Jane xx

How I Changed My Name – Stickler.

We are familiar with it by now, on a first name basis, in fact: “The cancer” “Cam has cancer” “the cancer thing.”  Cam texts me after an appointment and refers to “my cancer”, like it was some sort of pet. A black slimy pet with too many fingers, that doesn’t do anything but sit in […]